I blogged about something completely different.
With the popularity of the Yogscast, Captain Sparklez and the like, livestreams are extremely popula. Having sites such as Twitch.TV around make it all the easier for amateur gamers to create a livestream and gain a small following.
These are not always good. I have seen some pretty bad livestreams in my time and some pretty enjoyable ones too. There is also a difference I have noticed between them.
It's quite honestly impossible to describe what is good about things and be funny. Mentioning them means that they will be done to the letter by the masses who want to be good but aren't. However, it's more than possible to give a list of reasons why a particular work is bad.
How to create a terrible livestream
Firstly, you have to copy everyone! See that guy doing a popular game? Do people like him? I bet it's because he's doing that popular game. It's an absolute law of nature that when people try to be successful, they blatantly rip off already successful people as much as they can.That's why so many people will make Minecraft streams playing out survival games. They don't want to add anything new to their streams because people will just look at them and think they'll be terrible for being different. And different is scary.
No, much more sensible would be to do exactly what that popular guy is doing.
Secondly, you need to be dull. People came to see a guy play a single player game, not to see an entertainment act. Remember how much fun you had when your friend invited you over to his house and then played final fantasy while you just sat there and watched? And not even conversation, because that gets in the way of the game.
No, just sit there, play the game, and occasionally go "ah, you bugger" when someone kills you. This is why the most popular person to live off of playing video games is a mute.
Third off, you need to win literally everything. Losers aren't any fun. Why would anyone who both plays video games and watches other people play video games online want to have anything to do with a loser?
It doesn't matter how you win. If you have to get cheep shots in with the ultimate noob tactics, go for it. If you ever lose, complain. Everyone watches amateur videos to watch a pro, that's just common knowledge.
Fourth, no pauses in the sound. You need constant audio in order to make sure everyone is aware there is a working microphone on the other end of the video. A good way of having this is to have music playing. It works best if it's spotify on your computer playing the music.
Now, there's a specific tendency in this music. Smooth jazz has been and gone, so playing this will get you rejected by the post 1940's crowd. Rock is a hit and miss genre, and only really works if it's loud, obnoxious and you can't tell what the lyrics are due to the screaming. One genre that never fails is rap music. Rap music with a constant beat and a smellable feeling of "I'm cool" will always fill the air and keep the dim viewers respect you.
You have to maintain constant view of what you see. It adds to the immersion. Breaking the view of the game so the crowd can see you interact with the recording equipment will remind the viewers of their experience interacting with the recording equipment. The more it happens, the better you are!
Also, have skype sounds on. Have people randomly come in when they talk to you. More voices make this seem fun. But still remember to barely interact with them at all, so you can remain untalking and dull, as mentioned earlier.
Remember all these steps and you'll do fine.
Oh! One more! Get my name wrong! If you say Susaga the proper way (Su-sar-ga) then you'll frighten folk. Say it Saugage-a or Suger-a. Much simpler.
Update: I forgot some!!!
You should also advertise everywhere! Literally. If you're streaming, you still have time to advertise. The people watching this will think highly of you and you won't seem at all like a glory-monger who goes around scrounging viewers from everywhere he can think of. I'm sure you could even ask the people you're playing alongside to watch, given how they're not busy or anything.
You need, more than anything, low video quality. If you can see more than 10 frames in a second, start running a couple tabs of youtube in the background. This can also help provide music, so you're technically saving time!
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